WaleAyo's Musings

I have always been fascinated by relationships, the ups and downs and everything in between. I like the fact that one person can somehow become your friend, family and everything else. It is quite intriguing how this comes about and develops and in a way takes over your existence. My fascination has meant that I take time to observe relationships and I have got quite a load on such that my friends believe that I have become very picky, though I would say I simply know exactly what I want. Here is one way for instance that I demonstrate what I want. You see before I can choose who to date, I need to consider who their friends are ( that will be after making sure they are God fearing and have the same principles). Why you may ask? Because just like dating, you choose who becomes your friend. It is not like family where you have no choice; this is your doing. You decide who you let into your life and your heart to become your friend. The type of person who you choose then must have ...

Dedicated to Onidajo Recently, I got a disappointing news and I felt all the emotions that is usually associated with it. From anger to pain to sadness and everything in between. What stood out to me though in spite of everything I was feeling at that time was Hope. Hope - the expectation that something hoped for can or will happen. That is what keeps me going. Too often we lose hope because of fear, because of disappointments, because it is not coming fast enough. We forget that adversity and trials sometimes prepare us for the future. They test our endurance in the hope, our faith in what is to come, our beliefs. Losing is easy, we all can do it but holding on to hope even after everything life throws at you is the hardest thing to do. Not losing hope is never easy but it is rewarding and helps keep us going through life's difficult days. I was reading through something President Obama said with the underlying message of hope. He asks that we choose hope over fear. Fear ...

When night falls And you're blanketed by that dark force When the whole world seems gloomy When the pain sets in Joy is just around the corner Darkness will be replaced You lead yourself to get hurt You are your biggest pain Stop those worthless thoughts You are wonderful, Sweet Awesome Precious You are the sun to someone's moon The light in someone's darkness The joy to their sadness You are YOU No one else can have that power That smile That look That laugh That warmth That quirk That voice So when you think It's all over When you're sure You've seen it all Look ahead Wait a minute Look around you Smell the roses Hug your friends Greet a stranger Be yourself You'll be surprised That that joy That radiance is in you You are PRECIOUS... WaleAyo.

I am not as confident as people think I am. I am not as self reliant as people think I am. I am just a girl like any other, with hopes and fears and a desire to be loved. I used to be the girl who decorated the pillows with her tears, the girl so afraid to hope, she never tried. I wished I was never born. I felt inferior and unloved. I once cried so much I lost my voice but everyone just thought I was ill. You know how when you are quiet people just fill things in without asking you ( yeah that was me), I never explained things to people.  The way I felt at that time gave me the empathy I have today. It is why I strive to understand rather than judge others. Let me explain. I was a girl who never quite felt beautiful. I was not even considered cute ( I mean you do not see anyone talking to me). I was the girl who was always buried in a book. The one who was treated as an outcast ( I was never privy to any class gist). I had friends alright, but I always felt just outside of t...

Ever wondered why people that are in love play silly games like race each other,  dance in the rain,  hose each other till they're soaking wet and still laugh while doing it? Because I've always wondered if I can ever see myself doing crazy stuff like that with anyone, it's downright silly and embarrassing but I think I get it now.  When you're in love you are so incredibly happy that you don't care who knows. Nothing else matters to you but that one person and everything they mean to you.  It's not that you know that they won't hurt you or that they won't laugh at you because they will,  it's that you don't care.  The way they make you feel most of the time makes up for the downs,  they make you feel so so so happy that you just have to take that chance even if it'll last just for a minute, you're willing to feel that good.  You feel so happy,  you feel like a kid again and you trust them so much, you're willing to be that sill...

I know all about pain The kind of pain that doesn't go away The kind that holds on And never leaves The kind that leaves you holding your breath Not sure you will ever breathe again It happened the first time you left The first time you walked out the door And never came back It was like lightening struck And I was left waiting for the thunder And was I right? I was torn Broken Shattered like broken glass Not quite complete again It was like nails on a broken skin Like a walk through fire Not sure I will survive So I look for you in every stranger Find your laughter in every friend But you are not coming back Not today Not ever So here comes the hard part I piece up the broken glass Never quite whole again Thunder is gone The calm after the storm I know I will be fine But darling, I still hope you come back Maybe not today But someday You never felt pain Till your best friend hands you your heart. Waleayo.

"There's a certain kind of impossibility that hurts you" I kind of have no idea what I meant by that but I think I meant that there are some things that are impossible that have the power to cause you so much pain. One of it is the impossibility of changing the past. You ever said something so hurtful that you didn't mean but you cannot go back to 'unsay' it,  so you live with the fact that you caused a loved one pain and that in turn causes you pain? That impossibility hurts you. It hurts you in the sense that when you see your loved ones hurting, you hurt too. For example, I am the first of the grandchildren from the maternal side of the family and sometimes I scold my younger ones to the point where they start crying and I feel so bad, I end up consoling them. Now that is just one example of several. When our loved ones hurt, we hurt too. Now imagine when you are the cause of the hurt then you hurt twice as hard. Too often we become so free with ...